the reflection of despair is revenge
by reminiscent-afterthought
Summary: One Rei invites another Rei to witness the game of Rabbit Doubt...except the script doesn't go quite like that.


**A/N:** Written for

Becoming the Tamer King Challenge, Getting the Real Miracle DE event (fic over 2500 words using three restrictions from the monthly restrict challenge)  
Monthly Restrict Challenge, challenge #03 - write a fic where more than 50% of it is dialogue, challenge #12 - there are 26 letters in the english alphabet. Your task this time is to use 25 and leave one out - just the one. The other 25 must be in there at least once. (q), and challenge #24 - write a crossover in which two characters with the same given name and/or the same surname meet (Rei from V-tamer meets Rei from Doubt)  
The Crossover Boot Camp, #005 – staking  
The Book a Prompt Challenge, #020 – trick  
Diversity Writing Challenge, d18 - write using the ticking clock device  
Advent Calendar 2015, day 9 – write in a manga verse

* * *

 **the reflection of despair is revenge**

The game's begun and they're here side by side, both seated on wheelchairs and for a moment, Saiba Rei wonders if she's staring at herself through a mirror in a dream.

Except her reflection has waist-length blue hair and black, soul-sucking eyes.

If she's hope, she thinks that reflection is despair.

'What are you thinking?' asks the other, tipping her head a little.

'If I'm hope,' Saiba Rei replies, 'then you're despair.'

The other laughs. 'True enough,' she says. 'In fact, more true than you realise right now, I think. But we'll get to that. We have a long time together after all.' She stretches her arms. 'Let us enjoy our time, as the game goes on.'

'Game?'

'Yes, game.' She returns her hands to her lap and pulls out a phone instead. A little rabbit hangs from it.

Saiba Rei knows this game. 'Rabbit Doubt.'

'Something like that,' the other agrees. 'But you don't have one, do you? That makes you the prize – and my companion, as we wait.'

'No…' Then, catching onto what hasn't yet been said. 'And your name is?'

'Ah.' The other laughed. It sounded surprisingly cruel, for all she claimed they were to watch a simple social game together. 'I'm Hazama Rei.'

'Oh,' says Saiba Rei. 'I'm Saiba Rei.'

'I know,' replies Hazama Rei. 'I'm the one who invited you.'

'Invited? I don't remember being invited anyway.'

'You don't.' Hazama Rei put a hand under her chin. 'People have a way of forgetting me. Or discrediting me.' Her face twists. 'Come now, don't look so befuddled. I'll explain it all. I'm a hypnotist, you know.'

'Hypnotist?'

'Yep. Of course, you probably know all those spiritualism stuff as entertainment. Shows you see on the television where we go to spooky old haunted places and tell the stories of the ghosts who live there. Things like that. Easy things like that. You've seen those shows, haven't you?'

'Yeah, I have. But…'

'You don't believe them?'

'It's not that exactly…' Saiba Rei realises very rapidly she needs to watch every word against this namesake. 'It's just that the first person to speak winds up telling most of the story, so the others don't add much at all…'

'And they get the same amount of glory?' Hazama Rei laughs. 'If only that were all. But it's more than that. It's an industry with frauds in it. Lots of frauds. And when a true spiritualist comes around, they scare like a bell-clapper amongst a bunch of crabs – or a wolf amongst the sheep, as it is.' And she laughs again as though there's a hidden reference in there. Maybe there is. 'But the frauds. They get scared and they scatter, except they don't go home and give up their acting because there's a true specialist on the stage. Oh no. They paint the truth as a fraud instead. They paint the truth with lies to protect their own lies – as though they're telling the truth…except they're not. And they drive the truth out. They drive the true spiritualists: the mediums, and the hypnotists like me, out. "Saimin Shoujo – Hypnotist Girl – exposed." That was their headline, see? And so they painted me a fraud and smeared my name in blood and then cast me out of the industry in shame.'

She's not crying though. Her black eyes are glittering.

Saiba Rei shivers.

'My parents tried their best,' Hazama Rei continues, 'they tried their best until they couldn't try anymore and they decided the best thing would be to leave this world entirely. A decision they made without asking me at all – but that's okay.' She closes her eyes. 'They died like they chose and I lived…like I chose. Because I didn't want to die. I wanted to teach the world the truth: my truth. And I wanted to make them pay.'

Saiba Rei understands that glimmer in her eyes now. She recognises it too. 'I have a brother,' she interrupts the tale hesitantly, but Hazama Rei lets her do so. 'His name's Neo, and he's only a few years older than me. And our parents aren't around. It's just the two of us. Though it used to be three of us… We had a friend, you see. Fujimoto Hideto. Though we weren't friends at first.

'We moved after our parents died. Into an apartment one of our uncles rented out for us, and they paid the bills and stuff as well. They left us to our own devices aside from that so we were a little annoyed we had to move at all…but it was a big house, and they sold it, and put aside the money for us when they could have easily taken it for themselves. I hear that happens in a lot of families. But they gave the money to us when we needed it.'

'Lucky,' Hazama Rei remarks.

'Yeah,' Saiba Rei smiles, 'we were lucky. And we were lucky to meet Hideto too, because it would have been a lonely beginning in a new town otherwise.' She touches her legs. 'Though I know Neo disagrees now. But before that, he was happy. We had to transfer schools as well, and Hideto was in his class at this new school. The best V-tamer in the school at the time, until my brother beat him. And he was the type of guy who was curious about strength, so he followed Neo home till I spotted him outside and invited him in. And we became friends like that. They played with their digimon. I watched them. We were all happy. But then Hideto was going to show me his digimon – they'd evolved, you see – and I ran across the road to meet him…except I didn't watch where I was going and a truck hit me.' She stares at her knees. 'I wound up paralysed. Hideto blames himself. Neo blames Hideto. But it's not Hideto's fault. I'm the one who ran across the road without looking both ways first.'

'An obvious truth, really,' Hazama Rei remarks, and Saiba Rei is startled because the other girl is so _frank_. 'But they choose to be blind to it. Another example. People distort the truth however they see fit and I don't like that. Do you?'

'How do you mean?' Saiba Rei asks. 'I mean, I agree that your situation is horrible and I definitely don't like what those other spiritualists did to you and to others with real spiritual powers, but my case is –'

'Entirely different?' Hazama Rei asks. 'Or exactly the same?' She smiles, a smile that makes Saiba Rei shiver again. 'It's not so different, really. I've met many people and they all think the same at first…but they also realise very swiftly they're wrong. But we'll go one at a time, to make it easier. One point at a time.'

She lifts a finger. 'One: Hideto blames himself. That's convenient, isn't it? That means he looks less at you, faces you less, helps you less when you need a friend more than ever. Am I wrong?'

'But that's because –' Saiba Rei begins.

'Because of your brother?' Hazama Rei asks. 'Maybe. Maybe not. In any case, two: your brother blames him. He has someone to blame other than his baby sister, and other than himself. Is he to blame at all? Maybe, maybe not. Where was he? And isn't it the role of the older brother to protect their younger sister?'

'You're generalising,' Saiba Rei says softly, but she can see the point and she doesn't want to see.

'Of course I am,' Hazama Rei replies. 'The truths of the world are built on extrapolation, after all. Some of them might be wrong after all, but until they are proven to be so…well, that's the very definition of truth, isn't it? What the majority believe and that's why the true spiritualists are frauds and the fakes are true spiritualists and why the world is so twisted and why I need to fix it with my own hands…'

'Because that's all you have?' Saiba Rei knows this. She's been it.

'Yes…' Hazama Rei smiles. 'You would know, wouldn't you?' She caresses the armrest of her wheelchair. 'Us with our useless legs…but I don't only have my hands. I have my voice as well. And thanks to my hypnotic powers, I have many wolves amongst the sheep.'

'Wolves?' Saiba Rei repeats. 'Sheep?'

'Wolves and sheep,' Hazama Rei agrees. 'A lot of people come to see me, you see. Miserable people. Pitiable people. People who've lost everything and need a reason to keep on going. So I give them something. Revenge.'

'Revenge?'

'Yes, revenge. And it's a very powerful thing, you know. It gives people who are on the brink of despair an extra kick. It gives them a reason to keep on living and that turns them into very powerful tools. And then after that, they herd the sheep. They are the wolves in sheep's clothing, you see. Hell-bent on revenge but tucked so carefully into the general picture as though they were always there…because they are. It's only their hunger for revenge that's different, the hunger I awake in them…and then their minds are empty, focused entirely on that revenge and I can add any extra whisper I want between their ears.'

She leans forward.

Saiba Rei cringes back.

Hazama Rei laughs. 'Wolves and sheep,' she repeats. 'The sheep are the general world, who don't yet know how to fall into that empty-mindedness that follows after despair that can save them from everything: from pain, from the shattering of their souls that comes with the truth they're blind to or they seek… The sheep are the poor pathetic blind fools that the wolves will slowly eat inside and out until there are more wolves then sheep – and then until there are only wolves in the world. My wolves.'

'Your wolves?' Saiba Rei repeats. 'You mean…you plan to control them all?'

'It's not that difficult,' says Hazama Rei. 'I only give them suggestions, after all. It's not magic. I can't tell them die and then watch them fall dead. It'll be like being an Empress rather, or a Monarch, or a God. I can pass messages from person to person and they can exponentially spread. They can spread all around the world. I can sit in the shadows if I want, or out in the sun. But the choice will be mine. Only mine.'

'So you'd take everybody else's choices away instead?' But she's not sure why she's horrified. She hadn't had a choice when Neo and Hideto put up those brick walls for her.

And yet… 'Why are you so horrified?' asks Hazama Rei. 'Isn't there a world you want that you're not getting? When your brother is pre-occupied in his studies that he claims will give you your legs back and yet what does he think he can do, that the best experts in the world cannot, aside from giving you false hope. If he's even doing that. Is he?'

'He was…' Saiba Rei admits, 'at first, but then he got so preoccupied with his studying – ' She shakes her head. 'Preoccupied's not the right word. More…'

'Obsessed,' offers Hazama Rei.

'Yeah,' Saiba Rei agrees. 'Obsessed. And with beating Hideto with his V-pets as well. Warg and Melga…'

'Warg and Melga?'

'Hideto's V-pets: a Wargreymon and MetalGarurumon. That's what he wanted to show me the day of the…accident. He was so excited and that made me excited too… but now it's all gone. Our excitement. All the fun we had. Even Warg and Melga. Neo battled Hideto with the caveat that he'd delete his V-pets if Neo won. And of course Neo won. So Hideto deleted both of them. And then he cried and Neo yelled at him, and then he left and never visited our house again. But we still see him. At school for Neo. And he lives nearby so I can see him from the windows sometimes…'

'But you want more,' Hazama Rei surmises. 'You want him to visit with you instead of leaving you alone. You want Neo to cure you, and if he can't cure you, you want him to be with you every waking moment as your legs and your arms when you can't reach high enough from your chair as well. You want them to carry you out of that apartment that's become your coffin box, don't you?'

'That's – ' Saiba Rei shakes her head. 'It sounds so selfish when you put it like that, but it's true, isn't it? All of that is true.' She looks at her knees, and how long they haven't moved. 'It hasn't been that long, compared to the years I've walked But it feels like an age and it'll only get longer.'

'Revenge is a dish best served cold,' says Hazama Rei.

'Revenge against who?' Saiba Rei asks. 'It was my own fault.'

'I know,' says Hazama Rei. 'Quite frankly, that's why I don't like you.'

And Saiba Rei is startled, because the conversation has suddenly twisted and Hazama Rei has suddenly stood out of her wheelchair, as though there's nothing wrong with her legs at all. 'You –'

Hazama Rei smirks. 'That's why you won't make a good wolf. That's why you can't be a wolf at all. I did try, you know. But I don't waste too much time with the failures.'

'Failures?'

'People I can't hypnotise. I can't hypnotise everyone, you see.' She walks over. There's nothing wrong with her legs after all. 'It's just suggestion, in the end. But some people are especially vulnerable. The ones without an atom of hope in their hearts. You might have gotten there. They might have pushed you there. But he got there first.'

'He who?' Saiba Rei asks faintly.

Hazama Rei holds the other's chin in place but doesn't answer. 'You'll see,' she says. 'You're a player too, in the end. A sad miserable player who's the golden sheep in a flock of white and the black wolf, but no-one will listen to you. And if someone starts listening, then the wolf will swipe in and bite their neck.' She drops down, close enough to bite the other's neck herself. 'Like this,' she whispers, and nips playfully before pulling away and bringing something else to her neck instead.

A needle. With something black in it. But Hazama Rei is holding her by her shoulder now, and holding her strongly.

'You can't run,' says Hazama Rei laughingly. 'You can't even walk. That wheelchair is your coffin, and it'll stay your coffin – unless, ooh, I can use that idea again. Nail you to the wall with stakes through every limb. Wouldn't that be a nice picture? And awfully fitting, I think. It'll be your punishment for making those two boys fall to their doom. What do you think?'

Saiba Rei thinks she's severely misjudged the other girl. They'd been kindred spirits for a moment, a fleeting moment – and now –

Maybe that reflection, that Hazama Rei is her despair after all.


End file.
